True 'Recovery'

[FedUP]

I'll be completely honest with you folks. 'Recovery', for me, has meant staying away from other Christians for the most part to be honest. I have been done the most harm in my life by other Christians to put it bluntly. All the while they lie, commit adultery against me, etc and out of the other side of their mouths say 'praise Jesus!', and I just got to a point I could not take that anymore and it also had the affect of making me very very angry at God, which I am not sure I have been able to completely rid myself of. It has been what I would term 'liberal Christianity' followers in my life who seem to think it's okay to change God's word to suit their behaviour. Sort of molding and shaping God instead of the other way around. The more I see people accepting man's private interpetations of God's word, usually to suit the 'modern' world, the more damage I see being done to our marriages, our ability to discipline our children, my ability to simply be a father specifically, and a whole host of other evils professing Christians do to suit their own world view as opposed to sticking to what God says. I frankly anymore don't see much difference between the church and the unbelieving world. The church has become absolutely overrun with philosophies etc introduced into it by Christians who think it is a nice mix to somehow 'temper' God's word and instruction with man's philosophies. I personally can't stomach that any more and I won't have a thing to do with those in the church who tout such stuff. I guess they feel they are more enlightened than God Himself somehow. In claiming Jesus to be a 'rebel', I assume they think it is OK then to actually rebel against God's commands of us as men and women, and then what happens is no one seeks to do the right thing and we get some of the appalling attitudes and behaviours that I and others have experienced. It is NOT abuse to insist on the truth of God's word. It is abusive to take God's word and twist it around like gumby, to suit our own desires and perspectives. God is no respector of persons and there are no 'special' dispensations for anyone, whether man, woman, or of any race. I also do not subscribe to what some call 'cheap grace', because I find upon close observation that false belief seems to very often be directly connected to some of the very behaviours which I myself have been deeply wounded by. One cannot compromise with sin nor be a friend to the world(or it's philosophies i.e. feminism, homosexuality, et al) without equally then being at enmity with God. My anger towards God was unmerited and no doubt nearly destroyed me, not realizing these people professing Chirst and yet doing what they do, and willfully, are the real enemy. And those so described are no doubt enemies of God. There is no 'cheap grace' for those who claim Christ with their lips and yet live like sons and daughters of hell in their hearts and in the lives they lead. Jezebel's behaviour created unbelief in Ahab and he turned against God. Job's wife said to him while he sufferred, 'Curse God and die!', but in Job's case, he didn't. I failed that miserably, because the more my wife, claiming Christ and her eternal salvation(no matter what) lied about me, commited adultery against me, had me arrested and made other false allegations against me and had many in the church helping her, then I finally broke and became angry with God. Now it appears I cannot even have a true father/son relationship with my boys, all because of her lies and the decisions of those who helped her in the same. Never seems to end, and this among other things is all I know any more of Christians. I honestly don't know how I could ever have any fellowship with them. I find virtually every preacher I have dealt with in just the past 3-4 years, the same way. They prefer reading 'Women Are From Venus, Men Are From Mars' and reject as defenite, God's word regarding same issues. What I see frankly, is a church world that has fallen into a state of uselessness.