asking for prayer, found a biblical counselor

[Carmen]

Lots of life changes going on...stress...

I had been looking for a counselor for quite some time, partly because of the SA and partly because of the tension in the family that the SA made worse. Hubby doesn't know I found a biblical counselor, I will check him out first - alone. Hubby hasn't made any efforts to find a psych at all although I insisted that we need to go together. He would probably be more hesitant about one that follows the bible as a guideline.

Finally found a biblical counselor in downtown, will take me about an hour to get to the other side of the city if I'm lucky and then I still have to find a parking spot - needle in a haystack. I could take public transport, but they strike often, you never know when, sometimes the announcement comes on fairly short notice and I want to be back in time to pick the kids up from school.

The appointment is this Thursday, and I have the willies and am getting a sore throat to boot (my daughter just had a cold). I have read a book about biblical counseling by Crabb, and though his approach seems balanced, he still seems strict to me, there is a small amount of circular reasoning going on there. What if the counselor likes the book, doesn't like it, or thinks I'm bonkers? What if he tells me to just live with the way things are at home? My daughter is failing in school, starting to get fat, and I know that even though she has dyslexia that her failure is partly my fault, and that of Hubby, that our relationship is strained. She is getting treatment, but if our relationship doesn't change for the better, she won't get the self-esteem she needs to overcome learning problems and lethargy. My son is doing okay in school, but has problems with his bowels that can lead to embarassing situations, I think that his self-esteem is low too, which prevents his cooperation in the matter and just makes things worse. Something has to be done now - and not only by me. Even if the counseling is successful in my case, I'm only half of the company.

I have been having headaches lately and tenseness in the shoulders, am seeing a medical fitness adviser this Wed. and will start going to the fitness center to combat that and other aches and pains. The money isn't really there for that, we desperately need it because our car is aging, but health is more important.

I did finally get a job (first real job in 16 years), teaching English to private students, but they are so busy that they don't have time to train me, somebody just quit and they got a lot of new students. I hope that I can start training soon - and making money, that would go a long way toward filling some gaps. I might even be able to teach German if someone gets sick, they said, and the student doesn't want to lose hours. They said that if I teach well they might send me to companies to teach business English, they already taught Italian to Hubby that way, usually stuff like that gets paid by the company. And hey, Willow, I am even making plans to get a motorcycle when I have earned enough, they can get through the nasty traffic here very fast, traffic has gotten so much worse in the last few years. I know, don't count your chickens until they have hatched. Maybe it is the midlife crisis, but a motorcycle would be so cool! To use a German word, affengeil! During the day I use the car, but am usually travelling alone, so I can justify the use of a motorcycle that would save gas and let the car rest.

I am nervous about the psych, but have not felt this optimistic in a long time, despite the trouble we are experiencing.

Please pray that the counselor is a good one, that the counseling works, that Hubby will agree to go - to any counselor, maybe even the Christian one if he turns out to be okay.

Carmen