things getting better

[bad girl]

I've been out for a while on vacation, missed the forum.

Had a good thing happen. I talked for several hours to this friend who had also left the church and it was so healing. I feel much better about things now. I was nervous about calling her, but she was so gracious and walked me through every detail. I told her of unrelated things that happened two years ago and she said that would have had her out the door.

Also, I got brave and attended sunday school and church at the one where I am now on a worship team. I have never seen such a compassionate gentle, noncontrolling group, but I am still so scared . I think Im scared because I am afraid I really am bad and that these nice people will end up with a troublemaker on their hands. This is because the church at the end treated me like I was a threat. I keep thinking, they don't really want me, I'm just trouble. All indications are, though that they really treasure my participation on the worship team. Worship was so neat today, at one moment, I felt as though I could reach out and touch the spirit.

I am learning something, though, that the Lord wants us to have peace in our lives and he doesn't lay a heavy burden on us. If we feel burdened, it is not of the Lord. I am learning that life doesn't have to be so hard.
Pat