My impressions

[Anna Marta]

Have been asked to write about my concentration camp experience. I saw numerable DVDs and read books, articles and researched the holacaust before I went. NOTHING prepared me for what I saw and felt actually walking on that dirt!

Looking thru the 1st window at a ton of hair that had been shaved from living heads before death... 2nd window the bolt of cloth made from the hair and the tiny pigtails on it. Thousands of shoes, eye glasses, baby clothes, suitcases dated with birth and death dates.

The shear vastness of the area of Aus I being dwarfed by the size of Aus II Birkenau made me feel dizzy. I remember it being hard to breathe and a sense of dizziness and nausea, the tears that flowed without my awareness. And the terrible realization that I was shutting down slowly as my mind was trying to protect my psychological self. I remember wanting to touch the dirt and looking at the grass and trees... knowing they had been fertilized by ashes of "the innocent."

A glass globe filled with human ashes and bone pieces... Pictures, drawings, personal and intimate articles, gallows, torture rooms, ovens, gas chambers, bunks piled high in buildings that yet hold the sense of hopelessness and suffering and all the time the same answerless questions echoed all around us, "Why?" "Who could think of such a thing?"

I shall never be quite the same person again, of that I am sure.

Now in today's world I see the comparisons and I know the truth of the saying that today they came for "them" and if I say nothing -- tomorrow "they will come for me" and there will be no one left to speak. In the end we are all jews... to this world :(:(:(

We who know about the reality of abuse because we believed such a "believable lie" should be the first to comprehend the shock of these poor people when the truth struck them!

Some truths set you free and others reveal how you have been fooled and bound...

AM

[simka2]

((((((((AM))))))))) I'm so sorry for what you are having to process thru right now. There are no words...and I'm not sure I envy you your task.

Coming from abusive situation involving leaders does put us in a difficult reality based situation. When you haven't experienced this sort of abuse all sorts of emotional protections and denials jump into place...but when you've been a victim of a trusted leader twisting things and using their power to commit atrocities there's no denial to run too :( The reality of it can be devestating!

Here listening if you need to process :)

[dougjb]

Hi Anna,
I am sure that this was a very sobering experience. I have heard many testimonies from people who saw the concentration camps and there is a parallel with what you have stated.
I guess it is a grim reminder of the consequences when evil people seize control of the reigns of power with the unrestrained use to bring about their evil schemes. The 20th century is filled with the flood of evil like Cambodia [the killing fields], Darfur, and Rwanda. I think that even experiencing something like this, as ugly as it is, could be used as a positive force to motivate people to stand up against tyranny in all its forms. After seeing the poisonous fruit of the evil, as far as my part, I do not want to be on the receiving end of something like what happened in the past.

dougjb
some food for thought

[beginagainrose]

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Now in today's world I see the comparisons and I know the truth of the saying that today they came for "them" and if I say nothing -- tomorrow "they will come for me" and there will be no one left to speak.[/SIZE] In the end we are all jews... to this world :(:(:(

We who know about the reality of abuse because we believed such a "believable lie" should be the first to comprehend the shock of these poor people when the truth struck them!

Some truths set you free and others reveal how you have been fooled and bound...

AM

What an eloquent truth!... told you that you were a writer!

[JaniceB]

In the end we are all jews... to this world :(:(:(


What an experience! I could only take one California mission after reading of the ordeals the friars went through to set them up. I can't even begin to imagine taking a tour of Holocaust sites. You are a brave lady and Steinar, well we already know he's a saint. (For new people that's a joke because Steinar is so patient. Check old threads for "St. Steinar")

I just read a book called "Jews, God, and History" by Max Dimont--a Jew--and he pointed out that Hitler killed lots more Christians than Jews. Dictators don't like competition and religion is competition for them.

Now, I'm readling a book by a Christian called "Israelistine." I don't really recommend it but as I was reading about the re-establishment of the nation of Israel I thought about it. You know, if it hadn't been for Hitler there probably wouldn't be an Israel, just some Jewish farms in Palestine that had been around since the early 1900s.

I don't believe God used Hitler but I believe that He uses evil for good purposes.

[Anna Marta]

I agree with you Janice. God can and often does use evil actions for the good.

After SA and connecting that to our tours in Poland, I realized how easily a dictator can gain power and the support of great numbers of people and successfully set up a circumstance where anyone of their choice could be gotten rid of. In that sense, we are all "potential Jews" if we ever get in the road of a government that sees us as either a threat or as a hindrance.

I cannot imagine the psychological impact of those people in the 30's and 40's as it slowly dawned on them what was actually happening. Even trying to put it into words is not possible if I compare my emotional and psychic pain of the process of finally coming to terms with the reality of SA and who was doing it.

Today I do understand how some of the survivors went on to live and make good lives for their children. There is a love that cannot die but must live to provide and create again.

AM