Children learn what they live

[dougjb]

Hi Everyone,

I have a plaque on the wall that I believe is simple but insightful when looking at life.

IF a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn.

IF a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight.

IF a child lives with ridicule. he learns to be shy.

IF a child lives with shame, he learns to feel guilty.

IF a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient.

IF a child lives with encouragement, he learns confidence.

IF a child lives with praise, he learns to appreciate.

IF a child lives with fairness, he learns justice.

IF a child lives with security, he learns to have faith.

IF a child lives with approval, he learns to like himself.

IF a child lives with acceptance and friendship, he learns to find love in the world.

It is my hope that this forum will be force to eliminate the negative by applying the positive. Mercy does triumph over judgment.

God bless you all.:D

dougjb
some food for thought

[Carmen]

This reminds me of Erikson's psychosocial stages of development. I just did a report on the effects of children witnessing domestic violence. Children are so impacted by what they see going on at home, they tend to learn from our example more that from what we tell them about life. All children can see through the facades and especially teens rebel if they see discrepancies.

Initiative vs. guilt is Erikson's third psychosocial stage.

http://www.childdevelopmentinfo.com/development/erickson.shtml (http://www.childdevelopmentinfo.com/development/erickson.shtml)

[dougjb]

Hi Carmen,

I did know that this tied in with Erikson's model on child development. I was hoping that something like this would in a small work towards developing a health environment for interpersonal communication. May be we can learn something from the kids - like seeing through the facades of adult behavior.

dougjb
some food for thought

[Carmen]

I guess that some adults including many here (and myself) have let their intuition atrophy. Some people still seem to arrive at adulthood with their intuitions intact. I think that the intuition may be like a muscle that needs to be exercised. Somewhere along the line for whatever reason we stopped exercising.

[Anna Marta]

I guess that some adults including many here (and myself) have let their intuition atrophy. ...Somewhere along the line for whatever reason we stopped exercising.

This strikes a strong chord in me! I think "intuition" has been so denigrated by the pseudo-intellectual higher educated "masses" who now dominate our society in many all areas of expertise that people have become afraid to acknowledge their "gut" or "intutive" reactions for fear of looking ignorant.

I use the educational system as an example. The educational system in our country from bottom to top has been infected. There has been a concerted effort to remove parental influence from the educational life of a child. John Holt, a now deceased pioneer in education made the point that the system has forgotten that no one knows a child better than its' mother (main care-giver) and the schools had ceased to respect this fact!

My daughter and I began reading John Holt's books after our first grandchild was born and have experienced the truth of much of what he wrote.

The teachers at school, the psychologist and the principal denigrated my daughter's observations, opinions and fears about her children. She has been treated as if she is an ignorant, uneducated trouble-maker who dares to question the professional opinions and actions of those in the system! It was not until she went outside the system that her "intuition and observations" were affirmed.

I use the church as an example. There as a time that "I knew" what I saw happening and the way it was being interpreted was not kosher according to my understanding of the Lord. However, not just myself, but most of us on this forum, were treated as if we were ignorant, uneducated trouble makers when we questioned the professional opinions and actions of those in the church system.

Now take this to the level of employment or politics or local government (if you are not in leadership) what happens if you take your intuitive thoughts to the leaders? Is it possible you were treated as if we were ignorant, uneducated trouble makers when we questioned the professional opinions and actions of those in the system?

I rest my case. Only the strong survive or those who become strong through experience! More power to us all...

AM