Hello

[Timid]

Quietly introducing myself. As you can see by my name I am a bit hesitant to trust a group of Christians again. But I saw this forum and started browsing. Maybe you all are different from the church goers of my past. I hope so.

I hope I can find some answers for my pain. I am so tired of friendly fire from those in the church. But without church, I feel so lost and alone.

I pray there is hope here.

Timid

[Willow]

Hi Timid... welcome to the forum!
We're all learning and struggling. From time to time there's a blow up here... but we all seem to hang together afterwards. All I can say is... dip in your big toe and see how it feels! I tend to be hypersensitive and easily hurt and have managed to survive and grow here for many years.

[Anna Marta]

Welcome Timid!

Can understand your hesitation. Learning to trust again is really hard. We are all in different places with our journey of recovery and we are here because we need help too and want to help others.

You may not find the exact answer you are looking for on any given day, but you will find people who will listen and believe you. For me knowing that someone actually heard me made a big difference.

Friendly fire is a type of betrayal, it causes serious wounds that can hurt us emotionally, psychologically and physically! Being betrayed and abused is supposed to make you hesitate and want to evaluate people and situations before you open up.

Warmly,
Anna Marta

[FreeinJesus]

Dear Timid, ((Welcome))

I am sorry you were hurt by people & their skewed version of "religion".

Feel free to post your story when you want.

I was a bit afraid to post my story because I had kept everything inside for so long, you know, the "no talk" rule...but once I got to letting it come out, it felt good!!
Good to know that I don't have to *protect* the abuser from the truth.
Xpastor has a lot to hide, but I don't.

I look forward to the day when all of xpastor's excommunications (they are usually taped or on dvd's)
are out there for the world to see!!! Some day I'm going to post his *sermons* (read)= indoctrination sessions & intimidation sessions) on You Tube for the all to see!!!
The truth should not be afraid to be out in the open & the fact that the cult I was in does not have the excommunication *sermons* available for the public to purchase shows me they have something to hide. It wouldn't surprise me if many of the sermons were edited as well...in the olden days he would say..."turn off the tape machine..." in the middle of a sermon.:rolleyes:

Well, Timid, it's a journey & I hope that you can see that God LOVES you! That love is not hinged on being in or out of an organization that calls itself a "church".;)

Take care!
fij

[ex-shep]

Rest assured you have found a safe place to share what is on your heart and mind. If you want to "listen" to the posts, feel free to do that as well. You will find many who have been there, seen it, done that and got the T-shirt. Make yourself at home. Virtual coffepot is always brewing. Welcome aboard.

[JaniceB]

I hope I can find some answers for my pain. I am so tired of friendly fire from those in the church. But without church, I feel so lost and alone.

I am right with you! I want to go to church but I don't want to know anyone there for fear of nasty things happening again.

I bet you'll find love and support here just as I have but like someone else said, don't take us too seriously because we're only human and we screw up too. I think the difference is that most of us are willing to listen to how our words made you feel. I love that part of this forum. Responsiveness is a wonderful thing.

Welcome and take care of yourself.

[ex-shep]

I am right with you! I want to go to church but I don't want to know anyone there for fear of nasty things happening again.


Welcome and take care of yourself.

I can relate to that one. I sat out church during December. It did not feel safe this year. In the early years of recovery even main line churches felt unsafe. I went to a Methodist church which has some members from abusive churches, is a safe come as you are, and I could heartily reccomend to anyone on the forum. Still the worship was leaving me shell shocked.

One thing that helped me was listening to worship services on the radio or internet. It is a safe way to shop around without the religious used car salesman waiting to pounce on a first time visitor. I used to sit near the exit in case I had a flashback. After a time, I sat there for the sweeping view of the sanctuary. I do not pretend that I have any easy answers. For me, it just got easier with time.

[Reg]

Quietly introducing myself. As you can see by my name I am a bit hesitant to trust a group of Christians again. But I saw this forum and started browsing. Maybe you all are different from the church goers of my past. I hope so.

I hope I can find some answers for my pain. I am so tired of friendly fire from those in the church. But without church, I feel so lost and alone.

I pray there is hope here.

Timid
Hi Timid,

Welcome. Trusting again is the BIG issue with all of us. I think you will find this place decidedly different from other sites you may have visited. We do not judge or condemn and allow those here to tell us about their reality. Many of us will be able to relate because we have similar stories. Finally, we could express the emotions we have buried for so long.

Here are a couple of links that may help you in your recovery process...

Stages in Recovery From Spiritual Abuse
http://www.christianrecovery.com/vb/showthread.php?t=8694&highlight=Trust

Distrust
http://www.christianrecovery.com/vb/showthread.php?t=8216&highlight=Trust

http://caic.org.au/leaving/recovery.htm

[Timid]

Thank you all for the warm welcome. I will continue to read your posts and listen to your stories. It seems we have things in common.

Thank you again.

Timid

[riverdove]

Timid,

I'm sad to hear another instance of spiritual abuse and I certainly know what you mean about not trusting a group of Christians .... from my own personl experience. It's a good idea to read and listen first. Reading off from this forum and many other websites have helped me maintain some kind of nolmacy that I'm not alone and I'm not crazy. Take care of you first.

[Jerry]

Quietly introducing myself. As you can see by my name I am a bit hesitant to trust a group of Christians again. But I saw this forum and started browsing. Maybe you all are different from the church goers of my past. I hope so.

I hope I can find some answers for my pain. I am so tired of friendly fire from those in the church. But without church, I feel so lost and alone.

I pray there is hope here.

Timid

Welcome Timid,,,
You can trust us,,,,you can trust that we are human,,,,you can trust that we make mistakes,,,,,you can trust that sometimes we say the wrong thing and on occasion must apologize,,,,you can trust that we all have distinct opinions,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,and finally,,,,,,,,,,,,,you can trust in our goodwill and good intentions,and trust that we care ;) I think you will fit in :D
Love Jerry

[Grey]

Hi & welcome, Timid.