depression

[Ontheroad]

Hi all,

I'm feeling bummed alot right now (nothing new and nothing threatening). :( It mostly has to do with my whole abusive church situation I left a few months ago and the extreme betrayal, hurt, and all that went with it. Actually, I was depressed alot while I was there, too, because things were so bad. I wondered if anyone has tips or ideas of what has helped them when they are depressed. Thanks.....

[Voyager]

I know it's hard to get motivated to try new things when you are depressed, but I have found great relief by finding new hobbies. When you are busy doing something you really enjoy, it keeps your mind off of the things that cause depression.

:cool:

[Beautiful_Dreamer]

It helps me to do something to get my mind off of things or to go out with friends or read or something...but do something that has nothing at all to do with what is bothering me.

[Willow]

I go for a long hard ride on my horse... or even just going out to the barn to feed and groom the horses.

Sometimes going to the thrift store and buying a heap of clothes for $20 helps too :rolleyes:

[Voyager]

Willow, you used to suffer worse bouts of depression than you do now - didn't you? My depression seems to have eased up too. I think time heals. The wounds don't just go away one day, I have just learned new ways to cope with them. I find that if I dwell on or talk about how badly I was duped or abused, I can easily get depressed again.

We're all in the same boat. Spiritual abuse is a definite cause of depression - among other underlying factors that allowed us to be abused to begin with. As we learn methods of coping, it's great to share them with others.

My biggest source of sanity is my band. I am a musician, and I love to play music. For years I abandoned my talents so that "the Lord could crucify my fleshly desires". Nonsense! God gave me music to enjoy, and I take great comfort in it.

Pursue your heart's desires, and you will find comfort. The absence of legalism can brighten many a dark day.

:cool:

[Jerry]

Dear Ontheroad,,,
The thing that helps me the most is finding something to laugh about.Now come on,,,,,with a husband , 3 kids , 2 dogs , 1 cat , a hamster and three fish,well maybe not the fish ;) your life certinly can.t be boring.Like when you had company and the dog decided to clean his butt in the middle of the living room :D . Or like when you looked out the kitchen window and your youngest is following a Skunk accross the yard saying "Here kitty kitty!! " Or that stupid "Deer in the headlights" look your Husband got on his face when he dropped his toothbrush,it hits the edge of the sink,rebounds off the bathtub,and lands in the toilet!,,,,,,With all that laughter , how can you possiably be depressed??????
Love Jerry

[Willow]

Voyager... yes yes... I was MUCH much worse than I am now. Going on an antidepressant worked wonders for me. I am on it and each time I ask if I can quit taking it, my doc encourages me to stay on it for my own good.

[Siobhanne]

I find that it helps my depression to find something that reminds me not to take life quite so seriously. I love to watch good comedy on TV.. My favorites are " I Love Lucy" re-runs or comedys with Carol Burnett, Vickie Lawerence or Harvey Kornman in it. I also love 'pink panther' cartoons.

I've been on anti-depressants in the past, but am not currently on them now ( but probably should be). I have a genetic predisposiition to depression but the family turmoil due to spiritual abuse was enough to push me over the edge.

Siobhanne.

[Voyager]

I love comedies too Siobhanne. It's hard to stay depressed when I'm watching Jim Carrey or Will Farrell. Has anyone seen "Anchorman" yet? I saw it in the theater and I couldn't stop laughing through the whole show. The video/dvd just became available for purchase or rental. Highly recommended. I got it and watched it again - it is so funny!

:p

[Savedbygrace]

I love comedies too Siobhanne. It's hard to stay depressed when I'm watching Jim Carrey or Will Farrell. Has anyone seen "Anchorman" yet? I saw it in the theater and I couldn't stop laughing through the whole show. The video/dvd just became available for purchase or rental. Highly recommended. I got it and watched it again - it is so funny!

:p
Haven't seen that one yet, but the kids and I LOVE Elf. That movie is so hilarious! Our favorite line is "Have you seen these toilets, they're GIANORMOUS!" Not many movies that I can enjoy as much as my 7 & 3 year olds do!

Will Farrell is great. I'll have to rent Anchorman.

[diva]

I started taking Paxil when the spiritual abuse began. I described myself as depressed, though I know wonder if that was the only way I could describe a situation where nothing made sense. Unfortunately, I'm one of those folks who shouldn't take Paxil. Everytime I told a doctor (MD or psychiatrist) that the Paxil wasn't working (that is, things still weren't making sense to me), they upped the dosage. Before I weaned off this fall, I was taking 60 mg. or roughly four times a normal dose.
What helped, besides getting off Paxil (and that is not in anyway intended to mean others should stop taking anti-depressants), was to realize that I was not alone. I was not the only one abused by this pastor and his sychophants. It also helped me to study spiritual abuse and to begin writing about it. Writing has always been my best way of processing.
Reading "The Ragamuffin Gospel" was a major help. That book really resonated for me and I highly recommend it. The author really understands grace and he has a way of helping others understand it too!

[Kerrin]

Thank you all for your honesty re: depression. I have been weaning off Valium for a year now with the help of an anti-depressant. I was ,unfortunately, put on valium 10 years ago when my husband was phisically abusing me! (Have gotten terribly addicted but am now down to 8mg a day, which is significant for me).
I have been denying that I need help, pretending I 'm not on an anti-depressant, (haven't told my new hubby of 2 years :o ).
Feel totally ashamed that I can't "cope", as my old church so readily reminded me of how weak I am over the past 10 or so years. Anyway, I have finally accepted, and made an appointment for counselling. I told my husband my DR says I have post traumatic stress disorder and I am needing help, he was a little surprised but very supportive. I still don't have courage to tell him about the medication.
Bless you all.
Love,
Kerrin :o

[Jerry]

Thank you all for your honesty re: depression. I have been weaning off Valium for a year now with the help of an anti-depressant. I was ,unfortunately, put on valium 10 years ago when my husband was phisically abusing me! (Have gotten terribly addicted but am now down to 8mg a day, which is significant for me).
I have been denying that I need help, pretending I 'm not on an anti-depressant, (haven't told my new hubby of 2 years :o ).
Feel totally ashamed that I can't "cope", as my old church so readily reminded me of how weak I am over the past 10 or so years. Anyway, I have finally accepted, and made an appointment for counselling. I told my husband my DR says I have post traumatic stress disorder and I am needing help, he was a little surprised but very supportive. I still don't have courage to tell him about the medication.
Bless you all.
Love,
Kerrin :o
Dear Karrin,,,
Come on sweetie,,,,,,,,,,,your projecting your fear on your husband.You told him of the PTSD,and since the "Med Problem" is in conjunction with that,I am not even sure I would say your addicted in the sence that it is ordinarly defined.I doubt that you are "Car-Jacking" and knocking over Party-Stores to feed your addiction ;) . I think your husband really loves you.While it may upset him to know,,,,,,,,I bet the long term overall impact on your relationship would be insignificant especially since you are getting help for the problem :D That is my guess anyway :D
Love Jerry

[Kerrin]

(( I think your husband really loves you.While it may upset him to know,,,,,,,,I bet the long term overall impact on your relationship would be insignificant especially since you are getting help for the problem :D That is my guess anyway :D
Love Jerry[/QUOTE] ))

:o :) Thanks dear sweet Jerry, You are right, having spent the last 2 weeks with my husband and the compasionate way he has been toward me since finding out my ex is missing in Thailand, I KNOW he loves me. I am a pain in the A... sometimes.
I now I should be honest, I guess I'm afraid of falling off the "proverbial' pedistal he has me on. BUT the whole idea of this reconciliation was to be totally honest with each other without hurting each other.
I enjoy your pearls of wisdom, encouragement and, dare I say , occasional controversial comment ;)
Thanx.
Kerrin :)
P.S You clear on the Toilet thing now???

[Kerrin]

:o
It's taken this long to reply to you and I'm sorry.
In having my first counselling session and another one on Friday, I have felt run over by a truck!
I never realized how raw the wounds are, nor how close to the surface.
I want to tell hubby, you are right. I know he loves me no matter what and he would be supportive, I just can't yet.
I have had trouble just getting out of bed to go to work, let alone anything else.
So sorry,
Kerrin :(

[Jerry]

P.S You clear on the Toilet thing now???
Yes,,,,I think so,,,,our toilets would only work in Austrailia,if installed upside down which would make them somewhat difficult to use,,,but would be an exellant source of amusement when watching the expression on the faces of people exiting the bathroom at a "Cocktail Party".So if possable,I'll bring my toilet but also plan on buying one there :D
Love Jerry

[ex-shep]

Best thing to recognise that depression is part of the recovery process. The best thing I can say is own it and do not let it own you. It does pass even though it does not feel like it now. The first three months out of my groups were a bummer. Eventually I was blessed with some new friendships and a new job which helped me get out of myself. Eventually I was able to stop and smell the roses.

I cannot really add anything else, but I must admit I do have a hankering for Duck Soup or the chase scene from What's Up Doc

[Claudia B.]

I've battled depression for most of my adult life, and most of the time, depression won the battle. Lately, I've been learning to trust God with both depression, and my response to it.

I've been writing about it on my blog, and I invite you to come and break cyber bread, and listen, contemplate, hear from God, and share if you would.

http://ragamuffindiva.blogspot.com

My e-mail is ragamuffindiva@hotmail.com. If you send me your e-mail, I'll send you another link that you may enjoy.

He is with us in the darkness. I like to think that sometimes He IS the darkness--a God womb, folding us within His walls, connecting us to Him with an umbilical cord of grace. Ready to give birth to what He knows that we shall be. Sometimes, we have to trust and surrender. Sometimes, that's everything.

Much love,
Claudia