wish they would forgive me

[christian sister]

the pastor and his wife from the old church I use to go to(abusive) are still angery with me for leaving,she just glared at me the last time I saw her. I Know that I have a lot of forgiveness that I need for them as well,but it makes it that much harder when they treat me that way that they did at this funeral that I went to that they were at.
But I also wish people at there church would see them as they really are as well, I have friends that go there that I wish would leave and find a loving church that preaches the truth.

[SpinningHead]

the pastor and his wife from the old church I use to go to(abusive) are still angery with me for leaving,she just glared at me the last time I saw her. I Know that I have a lot of forgiveness that I need for them as well,but it makes it that much harder when they treat me that way that they did at this funeral that I went to that they were at.
But I also wish people at there church would see them as they really are as well, I have friends that go there that I wish would leave and find a loving church that preaches the truth.

Honey, they should be concerned with YOU BEING ANGRY WITH THEM!! for their abusive behavior towards you!! Not the other way around! If I were you, I'd glare right back at Ms. Pastor fully knowing how evil she has treated you and others! And that she would even glare at you at a funeral??? Now that's tacky!!

Don't give them the steam off your breath!

[Jerry]

the pastor and his wife from the old church I use to go to(abusive) are still angery with me for leaving,she just glared at me the last time I saw her. I Know that I have a lot of forgiveness that I need for them as well,but it makes it that much harder when they treat me that way that they did at this funeral that I went to that they were at.
But I also wish people at there church would see them as they really are as well, I have friends that go there that I wish would leave and find a loving church that preaches the truth.

Dear Christian Sister,,,,
Sweetie,,,,don't worry or be concerned weather or not a former abuser forgives you.......While she is glaring at you,,,,,,,,Christ is glaring at her ;)

Love Jerry

[Carmen]

I know what you mean about wanting forgiveness, but I think it is better to work through your own issues and not worry about theirs for the moment. You have to find peace for yourself. The question is also whether you need to be forgiven at all for leaving. Leaving a church isn't a sin, no matter how they lay it out. I'd rather think that they have an attitude problem if they think leaving would be a sin. They don't have a monopoly on the gospel, their church is not the only one that exists and they are not the messiah, Jesus is. I think it rather pathetic that they don't seem to know that. It may help you forgive them more if you see it that way I think. If you see them as people that are blind and deluded (which they are if they think they're the best or only thing going), you might rather have pity on them than anger. Being outside of such a delusion, you are already much better off than they are.

[jane]

when I read your post, it appears to me that you are wishing that your pastor and his wife would forgive you for leaving......am I reading this correctly?


There is no such sin. You would have to show me in the Bible where leaving a church is a sin. Especially since it is my understanding that believers are all apart of a body of Christ.......... so if you didn't leave Jesus, you didn't leave them.......right?

I think what you feel might be closer to guilt or shame that is inherent in abusive relationships of all kind.

My hugs and love to you, keep posting. I think you'll find this a warm place to be.

love,
jane



the pastor and his wife from the old church I use to go to(abusive) are still angery with me for leaving,she just glared at me the last time I saw her. I Know that I have a lot of forgiveness that I need for them as well,but it makes it that much harder when they treat me that way that they did at this funeral that I went to that they were at.
But I also wish people at there church would see them as they really are as well, I have friends that go there that I wish would leave and find a loving church that preaches the truth.

[DiligentLily]

Christian Sister, I know exactly how you feel. I am thirteen years now out of my old church and it still stings me that they hold my leaving against me. If I had stayed and knuckled under to their intrusion and control, they would have forgiven me everything else, but leaving is the real 'unforgiveable sin' in abusive groups. But I only really began the healing process a few months ago, and it is definitely getting better. The best thing is to keep working through the abuse and really getting it deep down in your gut that they wronged you, not the other way around. :mad: Talking about it, reading about it, and praying about it will make the truth of the situation more real to you. And time and distance away from the unhealthy group, and more time in the real world will get your head clear.

I hope soon you begin to feel empowered and even angry at them. Then you can begin trying to forgive them. But forget about them forgiving you. What they really need is some soul-searching of their own, and when that day comes and they see what they did to you and many others (I'm sure), they will need your pity more than anything else.

[christian sister]

Thank you for your kind words Yes I need a healing from all the abuse done to me from this church. Pray that I will get over all this abuse. Also pray for those that are still in this chruch and think its ok to get "a spiritual spanking" from this pastor, as was told me by a person from this church, that I saw at the store one day.

[mary]

Thank you for your kind words Yes I need a healing from all the abuse done to me from this church. Pray that I will get over all this abuse. Also pray for those that are still in this chruch and think its ok to get "a spiritual spanking" from this pastor, as was told me by a person from this church, that I saw at the store one day.

CS, these people are friggin' CRAZY. Four-alarm, flaming, plastic-banana fruitcakes.

Their claim to Christianity is as phony as any $3 bill you're ever going to see.

I had one friend who left the church I was thrown out of and I thought she was my friend - until I started seeing signs that she was back in contact with "pastor." For one thing, she told me that I wasn't a Christian unless I went to "pastor" and asked to reconcile with him. She bought me a book by some nitwit "Christian counselor" that claimed people had to do this. So I returned the book to her - and I dropped her like a hot potato. That was almost a month ago and I feel great about it. :D :D :D My own counselor told me that he thought "pastor" was behind that whole thing. Good riddance to bad garbage.

Same for you, CS. As for your job situation, I don't know where you are, but I can certainly pray for you, as I said in another post. Things are pretty bad where I am (all those thousands of Ford workers, of which my husband is one, are being let go as of this coming Thursday) - but we don't lose hope. We have our Heavenly Father on our side and He will provide!!! I just pray for His most gracious provision for you - for He will never fail to hear the prayers of and for His children!!!!

mary

[Elisabeth]

Thank you for your kind words Yes I need a healing from all the abuse done to me from this church. Pray that I will get over all this abuse. Also pray for those that are still in this chruch and think its ok to get "a spiritual spanking" from this pastor, as was told me by a person from this church, that I saw at the store one day.

Spiritual spanking from the pastor?! Honey, who is he to give spankings, spiritual or otherwise, to anybody? Sounds like this guy has it all sewn up, "I can abuse you and it's okay for me to abuse you because I am the pastor and therefore a spiritual giant!" :eek: How many ways can you spell baloney?

[Janice]

Dear Christian Sister,,,,
Sweetie,,,,don't worry or be concerned weather or not a former abuser forgives you.......While she is glaring at you,,,,,,,,Christ is glaring at her ;)

Love Jerry

good one jer! ;)