Fuming!!!!

[leelees]

yep you guessed it...im not a happy bunny at the moment!!!!

im actually very angry right now...was on lunch at work and walked iin and who was standing there staring at me as i walked in?!...yep...BAD PASTOR!!! i was realing with anger and from that time onwards i have been reverting to the time when i went through a weird angry rebellious teenager stage...i have been snappy at silly things! i was not impressed!
it was on halloween day and i thought halloween night had come early! hah

then on my b'day he walked past the shop again!!!

im sure if i moved to the outer hebredies hed still bloody well track me down!!!

**sigh** :mad: :mad: :mad:
prayer would be cooly!!!!

[InTheory]

So sorry Leelees!!! (((hugs)))

This sucks...

Just remember that he doesn't have the same power over you anymore...I KNOW IT STILL SUCKS THOUGH!!! :cool:

[mary]

So sorry, Leelees, that you had an encounter with that evil one... But he has, as InTheory says, no power over you. Only the Lord has power over you -- and He loves you!

Beware of the Outer Hebrides, though: that's where my "bad pastor" is from... Many of them are not nice people there... :eek: :mad: :mad: :mad: If your bad pastor followed you there, he'd fit right in nicely, I have a hunch...

mary

[dougjb]

Hi Leelees,
I know what you are going through been there and done that. I have found that these people are like bad gas, they make a stink for a moment and dissipate rapidly. I hope the smell does not linger too long in your nose. I am attempting to have a little levity in the situation.;) I hope it does not offend - love.

Some food for thought
Dougjb:D :D

[ex-shep]

It is easier said than done sometimes, but there is the slogan "Act don't react". One thing that I have to do is see what feeling are coming to the surface and determine what is really going on. I also have had to have a set of evasive manuever ready the next time I run into a former member.

I have also had to learn to underreact. I like the cartoon character Droopy myself. His deadpan style is irrestible. "You know what, I'm triggered".

The woman who used to give me fits at my former job moved into the neighborhood. My wife and I joke about it. Oddly enough she was on the train this week. Fortunately this week I am driving. The old expression of "OK, whatever" can work wonders. Growing up in an old Jewish neighborhood was not bad either. "I sweat, I toil, and what thanks do I get. A witchy poo. I should be so lucky. What is a recovering codependent to do? Oye Ve. If all out fails, a nice order of blintzes should do just fine. :p

[SpinningHead]

Congratulations! Here's your "I survived seeing the Bad-Pastor" T-shirt, coffee mug, visor and lunch pass to Applebee's (valid Mondays only).

I know it sucks. We've all been there. This too will pass and you will process this experience along w/ all those feelings that surface. But it does suck. :(

[ex-shep]

Congratulations! Here's your "I survived seeing the Bad-Pastor" T-shirt, coffee mug, visor and lunch pass to Applebee's (valid Mondays only).

I know it sucks. We've all been there. This too will pass and you will process this experience along w/ all those feelings that surface. But it does suck. :(


Makes my latte look insignificant. But you are right. The good news is it does pass, even it may not feel like it at the time.

[hornblower]

Im so sorry leelees that you are suffering right now going through this pain of seeing your abuser. It often seems just when we are beginning to get better its as if the one thing happens to bring us way down and there we go, bingo, all over again, we are right where we started from. IT SUCKS!

My big help right now is the stephens minister that has come into my life. She is helping me see that of course things will get bad when we are beginning to get healed. Trying to have us fail is of course the enemies biggest plan.

I hope you have some one that can help you cope right now close to you..........a good friend that will understand.........a family member even? I think all of this is like going through grief. Waves of anger, fear, crying, hit us. This grief material I have gotten says to 'feel' the grief and dont deny it.

Like really cry it all out, journal it, nap and rest, warm baths, whatever makes you feel better and doing something good for yourself.

These people have abused us so we need to be good to ourselves so we can heal. Healing needs to be a huge part of our lives right now. Realising that we are not over the hurt and we are angry about what happened to us is normal and healthy. We cant make these people dissapear unfortuantely and we have to keep living and slowly move on to live our lives. Believe the truth that you are a good person and this man did an evil thing to you so too bad for him and good for you!

God sees, God will repay.
It doesnt seem like it will ever happen but believe me it will!
I find that I struggle with believing that I really am a good person. This seems to be one of the root problems with myself. Im not perfect but I do my all to try to be a good person, someone God will be happy knowing and wanting in His kingdom.

For what ever reason these bad things have happened to me but that doesnt mean that because something bad happened to me that I am BAD?
Think on this if it helps you, think of the things in your heart and the way that you stay true to the Lord on the day to day. I think you will see like I am beginning too these things that have happened to us are because of the evil in this world and we are most likely suffering just like Jesus did.

He suffered for things he didnt do wrong and so we are suffering too! Because of this my friend the bible promises us a great reward layed up for us in heaven. WE may never see it here and that is sad but we can encourage each other in our suffering while we are here that we are not alone and that we have done our best to do the right thing.

So anyway in the meantime lest go ahead and celibrate who we are by doing good thing to ourselves. Not being selfish, or vindictive even though we would early like to be the injustices are so severe. We are angry very angry so is our father GOD. He is so much more angry than we are. After all we are his little kids.

I have seen this Lellees. I have seen these people that have hurt someone be paid back and its so horrible when it happens we would wish that we would have prayed for them, so believe me if anyone touches you and hurts you causing you to have a hard time following God any longer they will be severely dealt with by our Lord that loves you so very very much. No one can be you or take your place in His eyes.

You are so very dear to Him.
Its hard that you have seen this man. That the very sight of him makes you feel this way. Thats not fair that he can take away your happiness that is so hard for any of us to be able to recieve in the first place isnt it? God wants you to know how loved you are and how special you are to Him.

Try in whatever little ways that you can think of to be in a place of receiving what He has for you. Hopefully God will answer your prayers and mine to help you to recieve what He has for you, which is Love my friend, pure love sent down from the Father of lights, just for you our precious leelees. Take good care of you and you alone deserve it.
We all love you leelees...............praying for you.

[Janice]

Good to "see" you again stranger! Sorry about your encounter & happy belated birthday!!

[Carmen]

Hi LeeLees,

Sorry about the close encounter. Halloween did fit, eh? Something like that would have shocked me. I have been rehearsing different versions of how to act and what to say (or not say) if I see Pastor sometime, though I don't know if that will work. I may be too shocked or get angry. What if he gets shocked or angry? What if he has a poker-face? I want to have a poker-face.

I like the reference to Droopy, ex-shep. :) Acting like Mr. Magoo might work too, being too short-sighted to see the person at all...but that might be overdoing it. :p

You're in my prayers, LeeLees.

[mary]

If I ever saw "pastor" again and if I absolutely could not avoid speaking to him (we don't live that far apart & it could happen, I suppose), I would have just one thing to say to him:

"You need to get out of that pulpit, PAL, and cry out to the Lord to save you. You defile that pulpit and (the one in Canada) every time you step into them. You spit in God's very eye every time you 'attempt' to preach. I wouldn't keep doing that if I were you."

If he said anything in reply, due to his past threats, I would get out my pepper spray and my cell phone to call 911. Mostly, though, I would hope that if I ever saw "pastor" and/or his "lovely" wife again, I would just walk by them without speaking or even glancing at them. The past relationship is not worth dignifying by any discernible acknowledgment that it ever existed.

mary

[ex-shep]

Hi LeeLees,

Sorry about the close encounter. Halloween did fit, eh? Something like that would have shocked me. I have been rehearsing different versions of how to act and what to say (or not say) if I see Pastor sometime, though I don't know if that will work. I may be too shocked or get angry. What if he gets shocked or angry? What if he has a poker-face? I want to have a poker-face.

I like the reference to Droopy, ex-shep. :) Acting like Mr. Magoo might work too, being too short-sighted to see the person at all...but that might be overdoing it. :p

You're in my prayers, LeeLees.


Must admit I love the reference to Mr Maggo

[abbey]

I understand the feelings. :(

Its funny, my so called spiritual leader e-mailed my sister (as opposed to me) to see how I was doing? I swelled with anger at that!

How do you think im doing? I just exited your bizarre cult and am having all sorts of wonderful problems!:p Im dealing with the fact that Im filled with demons, have multiplicity , have lost my salvation and God hates me now. How are you?

As u can see, im still in an anger stage!

Anyhoo, im sorry to answer your post trying to help you, when I cant even sort thru my own thing. Your not alone. Your not alone.

[leelees]

aww tahnsk you all for your kind response!

i was mortified i have to say..no i dont really have anyone here who understands, only u folks!
i feel kind of alone in this....

in response to whoever put about having a calculated response...sorry memory has retired for the eve....my response would most likely entail the odd curse words amongst the friendly "bugger off's"

unfortunately i wud be disciplined for swearing int he shop and would no doubt get a letter of complaint from the "man" himself!

anywho...really nice to get some access to this place....erm..yeah still aint gotten round to writing lol oh well...whatch ur mail boxes!