Mad and creeped out

[Jo Jo]

I just found out that the leadership of the cult I was in is communicating with my friends mother. My friend is the lady that just finally left the church a year after I did. Why on earth is that pastor's wife being buddy, buddy with my friends mom and vise versa?! Argh! The cult is still giving some bit of money to the mission her mother is involved in, but the mother knows what happened to her daughter and even told her daughter she is glad she left especially because what was going on with the pastor's wife! The mother doesn't even go to that church and lives in another town all together.

So my friend tonight gets a message that her mom and the pastor's wife have been exchanging friendly emails and her mom says she is so glad about this because they (the cult leadership) are hurting, too. OH MY GOD! It's so nice that her mom has time to reach out to the cult leaders, she is in Vietnam right now, my friend says she would love to hear from her mom like that. sigh. :(

I know how manipulative this pastor's wife can be, so I don't even know why I'm surprised she has weaseled her way in to cause rift and hurt like this... but how far is it going to go? How can this be stopped now? I'm so frightened about this. My poor friend is just sick about it. Will these warped people ever let the people that want to leave, just leave? We are not stalking and haunting them... what is their problem? They still have other lives there they are ruining? Why can't they leave us alone?

[Carmen]

:eek: It sounds like they are trying to poison her mom against her and mess up the family. Maybe you should talk to your friend's mom and warn her. Do you think she would listen?

[mary]

Wow. The Prince of the Air will stop at nothing, will he? Using people like that... That's monstrous, Jo Jo.

Methinks Psalms 55 and 56 are in order here.

Love,

mary

[hornblower]

I think someone needs to talk to that Mother and let her know how she is hurting her daughter with this action. I think of a similar situation in my own life and I told my Mother just how it felt to have her be nice to someone who was my absolute abuser! My Mom never said anything but the relationship stopped at least. Thats helped me to know that. A family should stick by each other no matter what. If the cult is hurting hey I say they should, they brought it on themselves.

[Jerry]

Why can't they leave us alone?

Dear Jo-Jo,,,
Because they are children of a "Lesser god"
Love Jerry

[Jo Jo]

Because they are children of a "Lesser god"

Yes, that makes sense, and thanks you guys for all the good advise.

I'm hoping my friend will try to talk to her mother, but then I know she is frightened what will be shared back to the pastor's wife. You know once you are out you don't even want to be remembered to them.

My friend has counseled with this pastor's wife, so the pastor's wife knows my friend has been hurt this way before by her mother. Her mother chooses to help and support others before her daughter. So of course she gets in here and repeats the same hurt, and causes trouble the same way. She knows my friends buttons. It's total cruelty!

This is the kind of stuff they have on us, that is why they went to my trained counselor, to share my personal stuff and try to discredit me... but I'm so glad that my counselor didn't listen to them and poo pooed them right out of her office. But now they are getting between my friend and her mother. I hope this can end positive too. :S

I hope my friend starts by trying to talk with her mother and I hope her mother listens. One thing maybe she can say is that they (the cult leadership) need to look for love and support closer in their community and not with her if they are so hurting. They are totally isolated and this is the big part of their problem. If they would come out of their bushel and start moving around again. They could stop tearing up the lives of their sheep and blaming them for all of their unhappiness.

I don't know if I should talk to her mother yet... I'd love to give the ex-church leadership a piece of my mind, but they are beyond help and understanding as far as I can see... and to think how they were so close and loving personal friends and now how they play with our personal counseling history... It's like some freaky dream.

I'll keep you guys posted.

[leelees]

im furious! how the friggin hell can these numpties call themselves christians, when there are decent chritian people being hurt like we ar and have been! its just not fair!

[hornblower]

man that is so wrong to even talk to a persons relative that you have counciled in any way thats so totally unprofessional. You know though one reason people do not move about out in the real world is fear that they are better than the rest of the world and that somehow if they do mingle they will get stained. Thats really their problem. Their false deceptive way they see themselves in Christ. Like its them not Jesus that saved them in the first place spiritual pride Im telling you its the ultimate enemy of our souls.
I know we are all hurting here but you know in a way Im almost glad for myself that I went through all of this because for some reason I am seeing all of the time you can never be too humble. The most beautiful Christians that I have ever known are all very humble. For real not phoney but real humble.

Ill never forget one time I was complaining to God how my brother and my sister always got all of my parents attentions. You know what He said to me? "They dont have Me like you do." It hurts to not be special in the worlds eyes but...........Im in a much better place. Im with Him.
Id rather suffer with Him any day then have all that they have on this earth. Speaking of other Christians like these people here that do these things.

[butterfly]

Your poor friend JoJo I wonder if this would stop her from telling anything about herself or her family to her mother.

If her mother told the pastors wife then she will have information I"m sure your friend would"t want her to know.:( :( :(

How sad this is. butterfly shirley

[ex-shep]

I used to engage in the same type of chicanery-- and none too proud of it. There is an ends justifies the means dynamic of whatever it takes to do the Lord's will, do it. And if you are hurting someone, then that is OK, because you are doing God's will. The only reality is the group itself. More fun than a marrel of bonkeys. :mad: :(

[Jo Jo]

Yes, I know the group is doing anything to justify it's behavior and criminalizing us. My friend and I even played along in this for years so we know how it goes. They after all have God behind them... we have lost our way and live in darkness now. ;) Both of us are so much happier now that we are out of there and feel like we have our lives back, and not just serve and make that leadership happy, but it's this stuff that really sends you for a loop.

My friend has decided to talk to her mother with in the next few days, we can pray that goes well for her. Her mom and that group talk the same 'spiritual' lingo, so we will see, but hopefully she will hear her daughters pain and respect her wishes.

[Carmen]

I used to engage in the same type of chicanery-- and none too proud of it. There is an ends justifies the means dynamic of whatever it takes to do the Lord's will, do it. And if you are hurting someone, then that is OK, because you are doing God's will. The only reality is the group itself. More fun than a marrel of bonkeys. :mad: :(

Reminds me of Michael Jackson's moonwalk. It looks like you are going forward, but you are really going backward. Those numbskulls have missed a major point of Christianity. The means IS part of getting to the end. How we get there is an integral part of getting there. Those that walk on other's gravestones or hearts to do it may find themselves disqualified at the end. They may get the "I never knew you" bit. I don't know why so many disrespect Jesus so much that they ignore what he taught about the heart, about loving each other. Sure we all slip up, but if we follow where Jesus is pointing, then we can get back on the path. I wonder if abusers are on a different one? Maybe they should take a look at Jesus once in a while to get their bearings.

[ex-shep]

Reminds me of Michael Jackson's moonwalk. It looks like you are going forward, but you are really going backward. Those numbskulls have missed a major point of Christianity. The means IS part of getting to the end. How we get there is an integral part of getting there. Those that walk on other's gravestones or hearts to do it may find themselves disqualified at the end. They may get the "I never knew you" bit. I don't know why so many disrespect Jesus so much that they ignore what he taught about the heart, about loving each other. Sure we all slip up, but if we follow where Jesus is pointing, then we can get back on the path. I wonder if abusers are on a different one? Maybe they should take a look at Jesus once in a while to get their bearings.

Keeps me accountable. I cannot help but think of the verse in I Cor 13 if I do not have love [or charity as expressed in the KJV] then I am clashing gong and clanging symbol. Too much disonance for my taste.

[Carmen]

I always think of this one,

"There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death." Prov. 14:12.

Then I try to get my bearings and make sure I'm not on that way.

[Jo Jo]

My friend talked to her mother and did get a good response. She didn't mean to hurt her etc... Still supporting her in leaving and doesn't like the things going on there. We are just really puzzled over the first email and wished the mother would have been more clear on what she was saying and meaning. :confused: :confused:

My friend is very glad she chose to speak up to her mom right away, and maybe the hurt over all this cult stuff has strengthened her in the long run. Before both of us would have sat on our hands for a long time and just worried, and let the problem grow, instead of trying to see what was really going on.

There is no promise though that her mom isn't going to keep in contact with this group or that the group isn't going to hear possibly about us, but that is just worry... and no real concern, we hope. We will not continue to live our lives around them, even though these little blips come up, we will continue to battle them back. Trying to live like that... Cor 13 says. Easier said than done, eh? :rolleyes: ;) :)

Thanks for all the support in this guys!