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hornblower
07-18-2006, 10:35 AM
Im so distraught today. You guys know Im like ALONE all of the time. A friend called me last week. I had called her two weeks before that anmd left a messaage on her phone. So she calls me back acting hurried and asks me to have lunch with her so I said yes. So that happened to morrow. Then this other friend Ive written about her before too wrote a post card which my husband read out loud to me last night. (he gets the mail) I had been thinking about her so much wanting to hear from her missing our little letters we used to write to each other before our argument not really an argument. She is not the arguing type. I am!
Shes so sweetie pie. She tells me she loves me but shes never there for me never has been. In her mind she is in my mind shes not shes a wimp to be honest about it.
We used to go to that church together. I would get in these scrapes with the authorities and she would encourage me about any and all of it always on my side but then if one of them ever came up to her she was their best bud.........do you get my meaning here?
Heres the thing........I dont like the people that I know. I love them. Does that make sense? Something holds me to them that I dont understand, like my sister. I love her but man how much can one person hurt another one the way she did me?
She feels bad about not going to see my parents at all at ALL! Ever! My poor daddy in the hospital tied to a bed and she wouldnt go see him and people say to me.............well she just couldnt!
Well heck I DID! Like everyday! My mother in one hospital my dad in another one both of them with pnuemonia and Im the only person who cares about them???????
You see? Listen to all of this anger I have.
Now the tears are coming. Now we have to sell this house and give money to them, all of them when they didnt even so much as call my Mother. Send her a card on her birthday nothing!
Do you know what this silly friend of mine said to me when her Father died? She was furious with me because i didnt give her some money?
Now she was right down the road from my Mother funeral and she didnt come. It was on a holiday and she could have come she was having a problem with one eye but she could have come if she cared at all.
A few weeks later I get a card to the whole family.
No money?????????? Lol. Ive never heard of that? I didnt know what to say to her when she got angry at me for not giving her money.........
Now this latest thing is she is upset with me because i wont show her how to make jewelry any more. I said NO.
Why do I keep on with this?
Thge thing is I hate myself. I hate the way I post here. I hate my posts. I think Im like way out there loud mouth. Too scriptural whatever you want to call it. This morning its like she was putting it to me about not witnessing to people. Then she advised me that my inheritance will be taxed hugely.........if I dont spend it within a few days............????????
I think she is mad about how much Im getting which isnt much but still..........she is single and always saying to me......but you are married! I know it sounds like its all bad the truth is I cant tell who is that way because I always think its me.

One time way back we went on a trip together my car of course my reservation my everything. We split costs but she had to have me sleep elsewhere because I snored so I ended up on the couch.
On the way home I played some Bonnie Raitt for her........Im a huge blues fan. She started freaking out, saying I had to never play that music again with her in the car. I got mad and said hey this is my car! We stopped and she was literally shaking........she said it had sex on the music and she couldnt listen to it.
All of a sudden I realised that for me SHE was God.
I thought of her as being so much better than I am. Once again Im the bad kid. Like I always was in my family everything I did was wrong everything my sister and brother did was right.
It was like Jesus saying to me.........."are you going to listen to Me or them? Im the one who saved you and who made you, Im the one who says who you are not them and I say you are Righteous!"

I still cant accept it. Im reading Corrie Tem Booms book the Hiding Place right now and ofetn I think of the way she felt about her sister in those camps. Corrie was so human and her sister was like this angel from another world.

I dont know if my friend is like that or not but she puts on a good act. She always says I love you I bought you a birthday present I came to see you when you were in the hospital with cancer. To me...........those things are a given in a friendship. Who wouldnt do that if they were friends?
What I want is somebody who will be there through thick and thin. None of these people were ever there for me.
When I was sick she never came to see me but one time months after the initial diagnosis almost a year had passed. I was very sick at the time and couldnt get out of bed, my daughter didnt answer the door, so then she was mad at me.
You know to me she should have been there long before that, at least calling.
I dont know.
I dont want to be alone but then I really dont trust any of these people and it makes me not trust anybody at all.
I dont really believe my husband loves me. He never says so. He never kisses me. Never hugs me he only teases me. When I say something about it he just shrugs. But. He holds my hand as we fall asleep.
Is this love and relationships? Is it supposed to be this way and we just have tgo go on and forgive others for being the way they are and keep on being desperately lonely inside?
To me this is like a cult.
Im trapped. If I leave I have no one. If I stay I have to do it their way or the highway. Yet they keep holding on to me and wont let go?:mad:
I dont understand at all.
Help?
Is love always giving and never receiving?

outcast
07-18-2006, 11:07 AM
I don't think so. I can understand your feelings for these people b/c I have felt them too. I know it hurts to be alone, but sucky company is not much of a better alternative. I don't think these people are as spiritual as they seem. No one really is.

hornblower
07-18-2006, 11:37 AM
I don't think so. I can understand your feelings for these people b/c I have felt them too. I know it hurts to be alone, but sucky company is not much of a better alternative. I don't think these people are as spiritual as they seem. No one really is.

You gotcha. They are sucky and im not looking forward to being with this one lady at all tomorrow. I know Ill go because I just cant say no but hers what I really think. I think she wants to 'save' me. Shes on a mission to get me back in church. It aint going to happen............and Ive noticed shes never invited me to her own church lol!
Its like she wants to make up stuff about the holy spirit. Now sometimes i must admit its way to uncanny what happens (like God is speaking through her to me)but its like Ive got to suffer and suffer before that little tiny time comes between us.
We argue a lot!
Heres the thing with her she ahs always argued with everyone. She and her husband are this way all of the time. It plugs into my upbringing.
I come from a very argumentative family. My Dad raised us this way. Arguments were his way of teaching us to stand on our own. I guess he failed with me.

My brother was so vile nobody could stand him he could barely hold a job. God rest his soul. I know God is resting his soul too.

This woman though she argues with me and acts exasperated all of the time with me. So why is she with me?
Do you think I should just point blank get it over with and ask her?
Where are the intelligent kind hearted people? Are they all here? I want you to all have faces and arms to hold me sometimes. I so need some hugs.

Oh God this is what those women did to me. Yes they did. This one woman she held me one day and let me cry while the other one prayed in tongues behind me. This same woman after the pastors wife said what she said to me, took the pastors wife to a restaurant where she knew I would be coming. There the pair of them were in this booth together. The pastors wife had no idea and of course i didnt.
The last thing this woman ever said to me was ............."yeah we all knew we were doing you wrong we were hurting you but so what???????????"
Oh my God Ive never eally gotten in touch with this scenario with this so called intimate friend.

All along my life I have had friends like these. People I opened up too told all and trusted them and they used me for what ends I have no idea...........

No not entirely true. I had my councelor who always said she was my friend and who I still could not trust even though she tried to be my friend. She was always faithful to me. I should call her.
And once I had a friend not a very moral person but she was there for me in ways I can only now imagine I havent seen a person like she was in like forever. She took me in and I at the time was almost dead. She was truelly a good samaritan. I wonder where she is now. Ha I think her name was Faith too no kidding. Where are those people?
Then there was another friend she was like a goddess. I hurt her and Ill never be able to get over it. So Im not blameless at all.
Ok my back is now officially absolutely in so much pain Im like almost ready for the hospital

little lamb
07-18-2006, 11:37 PM
(((((hornblower)))))

i don't have anything great to say, i just wanted to be in there with you. ouch!

I don't think everybody is like this, it just really feels like it after a while.

clearly, though, if someone's got a double standard and is blaming me for the same types of things they do, then i'm not the only one with a problem.

love,
little lamb

Janice
07-19-2006, 01:59 AM
((((((((((Hornblower)))))))))

"ALONE" isn't good for me either. What helps me is to try and stay busy. Cleaning, yardwork..whatever! Just don't stay still and be alone with my thoughts.

Also...when my self worth comes into play, it helps me to read what God's Word says about me...."I AM a chosen people... I AM the head and NOT the tail...He who HAS begun a GOOD work in me WILL carry it through to completion!

HANG IN THERE!

Jo Jo
07-19-2006, 02:01 AM
The thing is I hate myself. I hate the way I post here. I hate my posts.

Oh gosh hornblower, I just saw this on here or I would have posted sooner... I love you and I love your posts. I love our exchanges on here. I've completely enjoyed what we've talked about. But I understand your feelings too. Sometimes I just totally feel like crap too. Please know that you are a special part of everything here - that you only have a few thousand pressures going on now and a few thousand difficult horrible hard things behind you that you are trying to deal with too. When things like that happens with those ladies... the so called friends it is just so hard to go on and trust and there are just sad horrible days. Those feelings and griefs have to come out somewhere - No wonder your back is about ready to explode too. I'm sure sorry this is all in your life right now and I don't have any good answers, but I guess if I was there I'd give you a hug.... so here ((((hug))))

hornblower
07-19-2006, 05:40 AM
(((((hornblower)))))

i don't have anything great to say, i just wanted to be in there with you. ouch!

I don't think everybody is like this, it just really feels like it after a while.

clearly, though, if someone's got a double standard and is blaming me for the same types of things they do, then i'm not the only one with a problem.

love,
little lamb


you are right little lamb im going to the lake with my daughter pray for me ok

hornblower
07-19-2006, 05:46 AM
((((((((((Hornblower)))))))))

"ALONE" isn't good for me either. What helps me is to try and stay busy. Cleaning, yardwork..whatever! Just don't stay still and be alone with my thoughts.

Also...when my self worth comes into play, it helps me to read what God's Word says about me...."I AM a chosen people... I AM the head and NOT the tail...He who HAS begun a GOOD work in me WILL carry it through to completion!

HANG IN THERE!


thankyou janice im scared right now about my back its so bad please poray a little for me ok its scaring me because its hurting right through to my chest waall and that mamogram thing has yet to be solved so anyway just have to sit here in pain and pray and hope god will keep both of us. your scripture helps esp that about the completion and a good work inside of me.........hard to grasp but i know he is the only real love i have ever known in my whole life

tapping this out...............my whole left side is frozen from a spasm...........same place the pain always goes
ill be gone for a few days without a puter so remember me as i will you
love you janice.

hornblower
07-19-2006, 05:48 AM
Oh gosh hornblower, I just saw this on here or I would have posted sooner... I love you and I love your posts. I love our exchanges on here. I've completely enjoyed what we've talked about. But I understand your feelings too. Sometimes I just totally feel like crap too. Please know that you are a special part of everything here - that you only have a few thousand pressures going on now and a few thousand difficult horrible hard things behind you that you are trying to deal with too. When things like that happens with those ladies... the so called friends it is just so hard to go on and trust and there are just sad horrible days. Those feelings and griefs have to come out somewhere - No wonder your back is about ready to explode too. I'm sure sorry this is all in your life right now and I don't have any good answers, but I guess if I was there I'd give you a hug.... so here ((((hug))))


thankyou so much for that sweet hug i cant type my finger is numbing up too dratted stuff my fault im sure spent way too much time on here and then that addedd stress you know. i love you jojo. pray for me ok

Jo Jo
07-19-2006, 03:41 PM
Try not to worry about the stress ... I hope you have a good vacation... and we will talk when you get back. You just take care of yourself for a bit and have a relaxing time. I hope your back feels better soon.

Still more hugs to you :)