Please stop...

[Savedbygrace]

To those it may concern:

This may be out of line, but I do not care. Please stop this public attacking / defending / taking sides / name calling.

If you feel you are being abused by someone here, put them on your IGNORE list. If you do not like someone, again, IGNORE. If you have already done this, THANK YOU!

I love all of the parties involved. This is heartbreaking. PLEASE, all of this is making me want to leave here. Or maybe I will have to add people to my IGNORE. I do not want to do that, because I have been greatly blessed by ALL of the different people involved by what they have had to say when they are focused on recovery.

[Voyager]

I wish I had learned about the ignore feature before now. If I did, I never would have got drawn into all of that insanity, because I wouldn't have even seen the names I was being called. Now that I have turned it on, I won't get triggered by what I don't see.

I think some people just love trauma. They love being able to blame someone. They can't blame their abuser so they blame someone else. This is probably part of what the abuse does to some of us. Have you ever read about trauma bonds? They occur when you get abused. Then as people get older they want to re-live the trauma of their youth, so they find people to help them do this. That's why many children who were abused grow up to marry an abusive spouse. They get to re-live their childhood in a way that seems "normal" to them. That's why many abusive wives migrate from one abuser to another. Men with dominating mothers try to find controlling wives.

Anyway, I don't want to help anyone re-live their trauma any longer. I have enough on my plate to deal with without the grief of being sucked into an online smear campaign.

:cool:

[Shadow]

SavedbyGrace:

It is most unfortunate but there is no stopping. You see when I came here I was badly hurt and abused, physically, spiritually, and some of it was subtle and some of it wasn't. All in the name of love and Jesus.

I am leaving the forum. I have never been banned as I have been accused of being.

One of the things in exposing my perpetrator, who has done nothing but put me through hell with his paranoia that I was anyone but Oopsie Daisey and set out through the "subtle powers of abuse" to lash out. If I am going to be lashed out at then like anyone who came from your churches you want the abuser brought to the light and you want it exposed and so did I.

I wanted it stopped when it was happening to me but just because I told my abusers to stop didn't mean they stopped. I can't continue on this forum because I am not only getting in the forum but I have been getting through other means. He is subtle and he is unsafe, unbalanced and is in need of the board but do not trust him because if you dare to disagree he will come back and subtly abuse you.
He is not all powerful and he is not God and never will be.

I am leaving the forum just like you all left your churches because you don't want any abuse. I can't take any more. I can't stand the evil that I recieve and that the half truths, not perceptions, half truths that are told and the things he does to hurt me purposely. I have had several emails from people on the forum saying that they too have had run in's with Voyager and that he is hell bent on ruin.

That is all I have to say. I will not be back.

I can't believe that this man/or woman or whatever is allowed on the forum with his behaviors.

PLEASE WATCH IT BECAUSE HE IS VERY ABUSIVE AND DOES STRANGE THINGS!


That is what I would tell anyone who would walk into a marriage with a man who I knew was abusive or walk into a church that was a cult. BEWARE~ AND Careful!

He hates my guts because my dad is a preacher and that is that.

If you cross his path, you will see what I mean. He wanted me to drip over him just like satan wanted all the praise away from God, so does voyager.

[Voyager]

P.S. - The only way to get free of trauma bonds is to educate ourselves on why we react the way we do to certain things. For me, it has to do with rejection. That's my trauma bond. While growing up I attended 10 different schools because we moved so often. This resulted in a lot of rejection for being the new kid on the block so often. Also, my dad left when I was only two years old. Then when I left my former church due to abuse, I lost hundreds of very close, long-term relationships due to being blacklisted by the pastor (which happened to anyone who left the church). So I think I get triggered when I see rejection coming. That's probably why I get so defensive when people start attacking me and calling me names. Most people would just leave, but instead I stay and fight.

I didn't come here to re-live any traumas. I can here for help, support, and healing. It doesn't help me when I come here and get slandered and called names. It is very counter-productive to healing. It probably turns a lot of people away who really need help. Hopefully the ignore feature will stop this from happening. Because if it doesn't I may have to leave here for good, which I do not want to do. Most of you are very kind, compassionate, and understanding. For those who aren't - we have the ignore button.

:cool: