Good News!!!!!!!!

[Blake]

Thanks you, whioever has been praying for me....


I have found two websites in England that will help me with support when I get back to London...

one is an organisation specifically for people iwth Spiritual abuse issues, and the other is an ex gay ministry that i can use as support while dealing with residue etc...

I ahev eben dreading going back to London as you know and now maybe this makes it all abit easier.

I am just afriad of committing to a church and being trapped in the "you have committed" and you cant leave scenario whiohc I ahve been under...you have to make it owrk..abnd then tolerate...and maybe this can give me breathing space while i SLOWLY DECIDE WHAT TO DO ETC:::

[Jerry]

Dear Blake,,,,
Good you found that stuff :) In following your posts of late,,,,,it seems like you are putting a lot of pressure on yourself,in addition to whatever outside pressure you are experiencing. Early in recovery this is natural,as it is natural for someone to point it out too :D ,,,,,If I am wrong ,,,just ignore the post ;)
Love Jerry

[Blake]

NO,

You are right. I have realised that my biggest issue is self hate and self loathing. I can encouerage and support everyone else, i aqm able to uphold and love compassionately those who need it, but I turn on me. This is honesty.

I have to be motre gentle on myselöf and I have realised how shame based a lot of my nature is.

I got a text from my best mate in SA which irritated me...


"Pse pray agianst the Metallica, fatBoy Slim, Collective Soul concert sponsered by Coke tonight in JOhannesburg. The imagery they are showing is satanic. Pray that this concert would be a total flop with technixcal hitches so that this sytematic demonisation of our youth would not happen, and that the souls oof the band members and audience would be saved by teh revelation of the love and mercy of Jesus. Amen Love andrew"



And this is my best friend who seems to annoy me more tah ever.. i feel like I am the anti christ sometimes bec asue I dont see things like he does...

I jsut dont like the attitude of pray this would flop etc...hes in full time ministry and a youth worker..and the whole thing upsets me cos it seems to be about salvation but more also about the thing of being a good christian...

I am an actor...what if I do a show with some imagery that is demonic or swering or non christian things???? Am i going to get prayer like this agianst me????????????????

Am I being a sacreligious bastard or am I just triggered, or do I ahve a point????

[Illuminated]

I am an actor...what if I do a show with some imagery that is demonic or swering or non christian things???? Am i going to get prayer like this agianst me???????????????? Am I being a sacreligious bastard or am I just triggered, or do I ahve a point????First of all, while triggering can be traumatic, talking about the trigger is part of the healing process, so, keep venting!
I don't know your history, but I DO know that praying against something, as the message from your friend suggested, is considered witchcraft. It is considered trying to manipulate the Holy Spirit, and it is unbiblical. An intercessory prayer group in my church was doing it, and they were asked to stop by the Pastor. I think perhaps it is an innocent misuse of prayer by many Christians. I think you should reply to your friend in SA and tell him that it is not right to pray that way. Whom shall you fear?
I know a good church in Cambridge, but I don't know a good church in London. Love ya!

[Blake]

Thank you.

I think you ae spot on.

[Voyager]

one is an organisation specifically for people iwth Spiritual abuse issues, and the other is an ex gay ministry that i can use as support while dealing with residue etc...
Blake, how did you stop being gay? I've never heard of anyone doing that before. They usually remain gay and lie about it. Do you want to stop being gay, or are you being pressured by the religious right?

You've just got to be yourself... whoever that is. I may be a heterosexual. You may be a homosexual. Neither of us is better than the other. Neither of us should have to change to gain anyone's approval.

:cool:

[Voyager]

Dear Blake,,,,
In following your posts of late,,,,,it seems like you are putting a lot of pressure on yourself,in addition to whatever outside pressure you are experiencing.
I agree with Jerry. Too much peer pressure seems to be geting the better of you Blake. In addition to the pressure you are putting on yourself.

Just be Blake and we will all be very happy. So will you.

:cool:

[Blake]

Thanks Voyager,

I agree with you about the pressure, but I cant see any biblical basiss for homsexuality being a thing from God. I know what the reasons for my issues are and am working through them. I cant see it as a good ting, but I do know that God is sorting through this stuff.

I do have some attraction to girls, and its slowly emerging at times..but i am alsos eeing that the more I try to be a "Good Christian" the more it all feels overwhelming...

but I do know what you are saying..outsdie of the whole gay issue etc...I am not gay at all..I know whay the sisues are there. Have you seen www.exodusglobal alliance.com or org?

:)

Blake

[Illuminated]

but i am alsos eeing that the more I try to be a "Good Christian" the more it all feels overwhelming... Blake
Yes, indeedy, being a good Christian can be very overwhelming. :confused:
Ya know what? I have realised that the only thing necessary to being a Christian is to accept Jesus as your Lord and Saviour. Then, the Holy Spirit will take care of the rest, just like you mentioned....
It is really hard for me to not feel condemned by others who try to condemn me. Then, I remember that I am a child of God and that there is no condemnation in Christ Jesus. ;)
The condemnation I feel is coming from the enemy via those condemning people.:o

[Voyager]

I saw what Christians can do to gay people, and it is very sad. I had a friend at my former church who was the worship leader. He and his wife used to hangout with my wife and I. I never knew he was gay. One day the pastor had me come in with an elder and they told me he was gay. They said they obeyed 1st Corinthians and excommunicated him from the church. We were told to not take his phone calls or even pray for him.

After I left this church a year later I looked this couple up. The guy said he almost committed suicide after being kicked of of the church he was in for 13 years. He is now doing much better, but has never returned to church. Neither have I. I've had enough of it for a lifetime.

If someone is gay, I don't think they can change - nor should they. I think God made them that way, and the issue of being gay in the Bible is as barbaric and bigoted as the verse that says women should keep quiet in church.

That's my two-cents worth. Take what you need and leave the rest.

:cool:

[butterfly]

Blake please don"t let christians destroy you.
I only know you from this forum but since you have come here I always had a desire to pray for you.:)
I am glad you are back here.
I know how christians can destroy someone who they feel are not obeying Gods word.
The sad part is they have no feelings for man kind only their kind.
Well Blake we are Gods kind. Jesus would not judge us like they do.
I get anger because they won"t even try to understand that everyones bodys work a different way.
If God wanted carbon copys he would of made us all the same.
I have a cousin who is gay. He and his partner are very loving people. More loving and understanding than christians.
We were given these bodys of ours and we have no control how they work. There are just some things we can"t fix. butterfly