religious fear from childhood

[lavendre]

warning: Could be triggers in this post....I posted some more about my bio in Jubileesong's post to me "Hi, Lavendre." As a child I heard a lot of negative religious ideas. They were wrapped up in manipulation.

Just a sampling:

To give you an idea, as a child I found on my grandmother's land near a creek a bunch of cigarette butts someone had left there. I decided to spell the words C A N C E R with the cigarettes. After I had it spelled out, a huge fear swept over me along with a feeling of dread and guilt that I had become defiled because I had actually touched cigarettes for the first time. I heard this kind of talk from the pulpit: "Those that even touch cigarettes are on the road to perdition" So I was as sinful as those smokers I had been taught to judge (no offense to smokers, I have since grown to not judge you) Anyway, it took awhile for the feeling to go away and I had to struggle for awhile. I have been prone to this taking of a small thing and blowing it up into the worst possible thing. I blame it on the manipulation I heard in church as a child with "h - e - double hockey sticks" as the attention grabber to wipe out any reasoning of the mind and the preacher as the authority figure of social influence. Do this here and you are a Balaam, or Do that and you are like Esau , or do this over here and you're a Judas, or do that you're bad as a Hitler. I heard this other one last year.. No I won't even go there, I still haven't got over that one I heard at a church I visited last year. It is more sophisticated in its twists and turns and doubt on a person's sincerity than these simple examples above.

Then there's:

Now I lay me down to sleep I pray the Lord my soul to keep, if I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take. What happens if I forget to pray, I thought as a child. On and on.... All these technicalities and superstitions. Step on a crack, break your mothers back. Did that - got afraid I broke my mom's back. Forget to brush your teeth and they will all fall out - I had those dreams too, where all my teeth fell out.

Many fears I deal with are wounds from childhood I think.

[Jerry]

[color=red]

To give you an idea, as a child I found on my grandmother's land near a creek a bunch of cigarette butts someone had left there. I decided to spell the words C A N C E R with the cigarettes. After I had it spelled out, a huge fear swept over me along with a feeling of dread and guilt that I had become defiled because I had actually touched cigarettes for the first time. I heard this kind of talk from the pulpit: "Those that even touch cigarettes are on the road to perdition" So I was as sinful as those smokers I had been taught to judge (no offense to smokers, I have since grown to not judge you) Anyway, it took awhile for the feeling to go away and I had to struggle for awhile. I have been prone to this taking of a small thing and blowing it up into the worst possible thing. I blame it on the manipulation I heard in church as a child with "h - e - double hockey sticks" as the attention grabber to wipe out any reasoning of the mind and the preacher as the authority figure of social influence. Do this here and you are a Balaam, or Do that and you are like Esau , or do this over here and you're a Judas, or do that you're bad as a Hitler. I heard this other one last year.. No I won't even go there, I still haven't got over that one I heard at a church I visited last year. It is more sophisticated in its twists and turns and doubt on a person's sincerity than these simple examples above.

.

Dear Lavendre,,,
1.Re.Cigaretts,,,,,Christ said"It's not what goes into the mouth that defileth a man but what comes out,for out of the abundence of the heart the mouth speeks".Smoking is bad for you,,,I am sure God does not like it,,,but it is hardly the unforgivable sin!!!!!!...2.You have accepted Christ,,,it is impossable for you to be indwelt by "Balaam"....3.Jacob and Esau made peace....4.Judas,,,cast the 30 pieces of silver on the Temple Floor ie: He repented..5..Unless you have exterminated 6 million Jews and plunged the entire world into war,,,there is no way you can be as bad as Hitler......6...The word hell in the context of your post is NOT I repete NOT swareing or hard language.The word Hell is simply the english translation of the Hebrew words "Sheol or Ghenna" it literaly means,"The Grave"or "Garbage Dump" depending on the direct object of the passage....Finally,,,,,,,The word Anti in English means against or opposed to;However in the Greek,,,,,it means"Instead of or Disguised as.Have you been decieved?????? Which "Christ" has been teaching you these falsehoods....You are going to be just fine.It is no sin to be decieved,,,,remaining decieved when presented with the truth is the sin,,,,and you have transended the deception.FINAL JUDGEMENT,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,will begin at the "Pulpit"
Love Jerry

[Emerging]

"Train up a child in the way he should go"
.. and when he is old he will find it REAL hard to depart from it.... :(

Well, that's MY version ... MY experience ... sigh!!

Why do these "Glory To Me" pastors and etc keep forgetting how very DOUBLE edged that promise is?

How can they ignore the incredible responsiblity that puts on them?
How can they?? ... How DARE they pretend otherwise! grrrr....

How loving of God to be showing us His Better Way. :)

[ex-shep]

The childhood fears is an interesting observation. Just recently, in a spiritual abuse forum, a poster made the comment of the spiritual abuse when children are hit with concepts of hell at too young an age. Children are not able to conceptionally take such an overload.

I was never able to follow up on it. I heard stories that the children, after the first 20 minutes of the Sunday bible school service were wisked away to Sunday school to endure such indoctrination. Ther ushers, in the children's corner of the sanctuary were quite imposing. One could pass for a mafia leader. If this be true, there would be quite a few grown ups loosing sleep over their Sunday school indoctrination. I wrote a factsheet on my group. Being an adult male single, with no romantic interests at the time, I never thought to look at the children's treatment. An interesting take, indeed.

[ex-shep]

[QUOTE=Emerging]"Train up a child in the way he should go"
.. and when he is old he will find it REAL hard to depart from it.... :(

Well, that's MY version ... MY experience ... sigh!!


Makes a great bumper sticker!! Sad but true.

[Sheep]

[QUOTE=Emerging]"Train up a child in the way he should go"
.. and when he is old he will find it REAL hard to depart from it.... :(


Saying "good-bye" to my parents forever (or to pastors, teachers, older siblings, employers, older siblings, etc. who have given me false messages/teachings) has been a difficult but necessary part of the grief process.

Baa...

Sheep

[Voyager]

Paraphrase:

"Fill a child's mind with religious terrorism when he/she is young, and it will torment them the rest of their lives. They may never be able to depart from it."

RLV (Real Life Version)

:(

[lavendre]

Thanks for all the responses! I haven't read them all yet, like what I have read. My family needs me just now so I'll have to come back later...to respond to responses. Thanks Jerry , I guess I like to say the hockey sticks thing for fun.. here I will spell the word out ...hell. :) Guess I looked goody two shoes...

[lavendre]

Back again... wow, all excellent posts, helpful posts...

:( ... all that awful teaching we heard..

I also got a lot of ideas of religion from all the old black and white movies I watched back when they played a lot on broadcast TV and from television also. They had lots of scary ideas and misconceptions in them.

[ex-shep]

trying to soak them in myself.

[lavendre]

warning could contain a trigger

trying to soak them in myself.

Hi ex-shep,

What do you mean by soak "them" in? Do you like to watch old black and white movies? As far as old movies, I love to watch them. Maybe that is what you are talking about. We check movies out from the library all the time. We checked out some Hitchcock lately. Also I do watch television, with discretion, so I was not refering to television being a sin or movies being a sin.

Trying to soak in the bad distorted doom and gloom religious thoughts from old movies? Couldn't possibly mean that? I was refering to the scary ideas (to children) of movies i.e. selling one's soul to the devil and hell fire and brimstone. I saw these as a child and they were pretty powerful ideas for someone who soaked in everything as a child.

I was left to watch television all by myself as a child without any supervision or guidance. I was a very impressionable child and didn't have guidance in the religious area from my parents. I wasn't taught religious discernment at all. I saw a lot of movies that I wasn't ready for as a child and that combined with and reinforced the scary teaching at church.

What old time movies and television do you enjoy?

[ex-shep]

No, by soaking, just pondering, giving the topic some thought. I know many who grew up in abusive churches. I forgot how the children were apparently treated until the post was brought up. Interesting topic was what as was getting at. Oh well, the english language is like a horse. Occassionally we get thrown.

[lavendre]

No, by soaking, just pondering, giving the topic some thought. I know many who grew up in abusive churches. I forgot how the children were apparently treated until the post was brought up. Interesting topic was what as was getting at. Oh well, the english language is like a horse. Occassionally we get thrown.

:o :) Thanks ex-shep for the clarification and your interest in the topic. Guess the wild and wooly english language can also be a lot of pun too! ;)

lavendre

[Jerry]

:) Guess I looked goody two shoes...


Dear Lavendre,,,,,
Hehehehe,,,,no,,,,I didn't think that :) I constructed the post that way because I feel that in study,,,,origional language definitions are very important ;)
Love Jerry

[Jerry]

Forget to brush your teeth and they will all fall out - I had those dreams too, where all my teeth fell out.


Dear Lavendre,,,,
About two or three times a week I go over old posts.I found this point in one of your posts that I forgot to address.................I guess my Grandmother always forgot to brush her teeth,,,,,cuz I was always finding them in a glass in the bathroom :eek:
Love Jerry :D