SpinningHead
11-02-2005, 01:58 PM
Hello all....
I have another book to recommend...I, personally would like it to be added to our list of resources.
Crucial Conversations by
Kerry Patterson,Joseph Grenny,Ron McMillan,Al Switzler,Stephen R. Covey
http://www.vitalsmarts.com/CrucialSkills/
This book was extremely helpful in recognizing conversation patterns and identifying my own patterns vs. others. Once I started recognizing things like fear, control, and bullying in other's conversations...my conversation pattern changed dramatically. It was extremely helpful towards the end of my church situation...I only regret I didn't read it before it all happened. It helps me to this day in talking about my situation w/ those who call me.
It was truly amazing in using the skills this book presents when talking to others about what we went through...especially in helping me identify when someone else in the conversation goes into (what the book identified as) "silence" or "violence".
The biggest thing it did for me is help me NOT to defend myself or hubby's self in our situation, keep the focus on the facts of what went on and NOT allow myself to get drawn into defending how I'm responsible for (what another thread identified as) "outcast behavior".
I seriously, seriously recommend anyone and everyone to read this book! I won't be surprised when you do you'll think of past church s/a conversations and identify a new pattern in the speech that was used. You'll look at people in a different way and see yourself as not being the victim like you used to be...b/c it provides you tools, insights, and a foundation to call the behavior for what it is and not what the person is attempting to distract you with.
For you readers out there...please read this book and tell me different! :D It really made my head spin! ;)
I have another book to recommend...I, personally would like it to be added to our list of resources.
Crucial Conversations by
Kerry Patterson,Joseph Grenny,Ron McMillan,Al Switzler,Stephen R. Covey
http://www.vitalsmarts.com/CrucialSkills/
This book was extremely helpful in recognizing conversation patterns and identifying my own patterns vs. others. Once I started recognizing things like fear, control, and bullying in other's conversations...my conversation pattern changed dramatically. It was extremely helpful towards the end of my church situation...I only regret I didn't read it before it all happened. It helps me to this day in talking about my situation w/ those who call me.
It was truly amazing in using the skills this book presents when talking to others about what we went through...especially in helping me identify when someone else in the conversation goes into (what the book identified as) "silence" or "violence".
The biggest thing it did for me is help me NOT to defend myself or hubby's self in our situation, keep the focus on the facts of what went on and NOT allow myself to get drawn into defending how I'm responsible for (what another thread identified as) "outcast behavior".
I seriously, seriously recommend anyone and everyone to read this book! I won't be surprised when you do you'll think of past church s/a conversations and identify a new pattern in the speech that was used. You'll look at people in a different way and see yourself as not being the victim like you used to be...b/c it provides you tools, insights, and a foundation to call the behavior for what it is and not what the person is attempting to distract you with.
For you readers out there...please read this book and tell me different! :D It really made my head spin! ;)