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View Full Version : I am persona non grata

Leslie
10-30-2005, 09:30 PM
Today was our wedding anniversary. When we got back from our dinner date to the in-laws' house, who'd sat with our kids I was once again ignored by my father-in-law. I am tired of bein treated like I don't exist by these people. I am tired of the spin that side of the famly puts on me so they can feel comfotable about themselves. I am tired of my feelings being illegitimized.

This has nothing to do with SA. Does anyone know of a forum for this? Thanks for letting me vent.
Jerry
10-31-2005, 03:43 AM
Dear Leslie,,,
The NACR forum is more about issues. If you think about it,any issue in your life is related to S/A in some way or another.
Love Jerry
Janice
10-31-2005, 04:31 AM
Today was our wedding anniversary. When we got back from our dinner date to the in-laws' house, who'd sat with our kids I was once again ignored by my father-in-law. I am tired of bein treated like I don't exist by these people. I am tired of the spin that side of the famly puts on me so they can feel comfotable about themselves. I am tired of my feelings being illegitimized.

This has nothing to do with SA. Does anyone know of a forum for this? Thanks for letting me vent.


Sorry you're going through this. Vent anytime!
Jerry
10-31-2005, 06:46 AM
Dear Leslie,,,
It is painful to be marginalized by those who should love us.Not to be discouraged,it happened to Christ too.Heres what He said about it ;) Luke 7 verses 30 - 35,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Your in good company.
Love Jerry
Leslie
10-31-2005, 08:32 AM
I'm feeling better now. Thanks for the nice words. I gain perspective on it all when I consider that these people are emotion-punishing and emotion-dismissing and as such have significant issues. I think it's Patrician Evans, author of Controlling People who wrote that such people are "single cylindar"--not functioning optimally because they overlook feelings and intuition. I'm also helped when I remember from John Gottman's writings on emotional intelligence that making bids for connection is emotionally sound and stonewalling them (their style) is not.

Thanks.
Hope 98
10-31-2005, 08:51 AM
Today was our wedding anniversary. When we got back from our dinner date to the in-laws' house, who'd sat with our kids I was once again ignored by my father-in-law. I am tired of bein treated like I don't exist by these people. I am tired of the spin that side of the famly puts on me so they can feel comfotable about themselves. I am tired of my feelings being illegitimized.

This has nothing to do with SA. Does anyone know of a forum for this? Thanks for letting me vent.

I'm not sure that it's fair to say this has nothing to do with Spiritual Abuse - it IS spiritual abuse - it's just not "professional" or "institutional" spiritual abuse.

Youre words could have come out of my mouth - with the exception of the "in-law" part. My own family treats me like I don't exist, except to the extent I challenge their self-images.

In my case, there are so many mixed messages and double talk that I question my sanity on a regular basis. I suspect that my family made up their minds long ago, and proving my sanity to them has become impossible.