geesh, so much tied in with the past.....

[Oopsie Daisey]

I am disheartened by my interview today. It doesn't feel like it went good, although I answered honestly and intelligently. I felt like the Doctor that I applied with, who done my interviewed showed me all the holes that I knew was already there. With Doctors it is hard to tell what they are thinking because they are so used to disguising their feelings and their emotions. I almost envy their ability to cover so well. I mean, once you work with them then it is easy to see through them but I have no feel for the interview from the doctor but if I look through my eyes it felt like all my failures were pointed out. I tried but that is not enough. I need a job... I seem to connect my spiritual, my self worth and other things to this and I got to get my stuff together. I wondered what I would do if they wanted references from others that I had known and I thought, rats, always before I gave them the people in my former church as references when they wanted someone outside of those I worked with or who were my bosses. But they didn't even ask for that stuff. The doctor said, which job do you want and I told him, and then he asked why I didn't have it wrote on my resume? I didn't know it existed until I got there. .... Dear, dear, dear. I want to crawl in a hole...I am embarrassed that I asked for prayer for the job now if I don't get it everyone will know I am a loser.

Melanie

[Emerging]

Dear, dear, dear. I want to crawl in a hole...I am embarrassed that I asked for prayer for the job now if I don't get it everyone will know I am a loser.

((((((((((((Melanie))))))))))))) you are NOT a loser! You are just another cute lil human being, just like ALL the rest of us!! I keep having things fall through too, you know? And our poor gerbil is doing worse - for so long I felt like you did and well, ... I hope it's not evil but now I tell my children to pray for anything and everything because then they will have done their part --- meaning, God won't be able to say that they didn't ask for His help. Instead, they will have put the ball in His court for Him to choose how to deal with. Like I said, not trying to be bad at all, just saying that I think praying is fine and since none of us are perfect, it's a great way for us to practice, practice and practice again.

Perfection only comes after enough practice combined with the grace of God I think .... and He loves to hear from you! And well, turn this into a learning experience = what did you do well? What didn't work out? What would you have done differently *knowing only what you knew as you knew it*?

Hang in there dear one! You are loved and you are WONDERFUL!!! :p :) :D

[Jerry]

NO,,,,,,,,,,If you don't get the job,,,,,,,we will know that it wasn't the job you need and we will continue to pray for your employment......Melanie,,,,,when you apply for a job and don't get it,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,believe me,,,,,you didn't want it ;) ...There is no way that you are a looser based on an interview,,,,,How do you know???????maybe you were being interviewed by a looser....I have done a lot of work for Doctors and in general they are pretty smart fellas,but I have also met a few that were dumber than a post :D So "Damn the torpedos,,,,,full speed ahead!!!!"
Love Jerry

[Oopsie Daisey]

Jerry and Emerging:

The doc was very smart. I picked that up the minute I sat down. It was like it was looking for reactions and I gave him one and I am disappointed in me. He was extremely intelligent. In fact, I wouldn't hesitate to guess that the things he was looking at, of whether he was looking for honesty and picking on my weakness to let me know he saw through my resume' which of course you don't volunteer things you don't have to and so he picked it a little. His right as the employer to look for what he wants in an employee. He was very smart because I had some tests of my own...and he passed mine. He does know what his employees do. He picked at my resume the more I think about it for a reason and I think that I done well with his picking. I don't know if I done well enough for the job.

I am so sorry. I really do know better. I didn't realize how irrational I was last night and how tired. I had also had a rotten kind of conversation with my brother and my mind was jumbled up when I talked to him. I was irrational and totally exhausted and making mountains out of molehills. Yes, I do know better, I just didn't know I was doing it last night until I totally came unglued and set here and cried non stop until there was nothing left to pour out to God and then I seen how ridiculous I was. Thanks for the support and my time of exhaustion and irrational thinking.

Love,
Melanie

[Doug64]

Hi Melanie:


Having been in a position where I interviewed and approved people for jobs, I have been on both sides of the desk.

When you are the interviewee, it's easy to think you'll never find a job. The duties, especially as listed in an official job description, can appear overwhelming. Often they aren't.
On the other hand, the interviewer may be looking for a certain personality that will fit into the work group. They may be looking for one skill in particular. If we don't have that personality or skill, we'll likely not be selected.

As Jerry said, you probably didn't want the job anyway, for those reasons or others.

Try to keep a positive attitude, and knowj that we are rooting for you.

Doug :cool:

[Oopsie Daisey]

Hi Melanie:


Having been in a position where I interviewed and approved people for jobs, I have been on both sides of the desk.

When you are the interviewee, it's easy to think you'll never find a job. The duties, especially as listed in an official job description, can appear overwhelming. Often they aren't.
On the other hand, the interviewer may be looking for a certain personality that will fit into the work group. They may be looking for one skill in particular. If we don't have that personality or skill, we'll likely not be selected.

As Jerry said, you probably didn't want the job anyway, for those reasons or others.

Try to keep a positive attitude, and knowj that we are rooting for you.

Doug :cool:
Hi Doug:

Thanks for your voice of experience sharing! It is critical that I remember that instead of falling apart after every interview. I have to tell you this. They turned right around and called me today and said they received my resume', would I be available to come in for an interview? AND so I said, would this be a second interview? And she said no why? I then replied, the Doctor interviewed me yesterday. She asked me how I knew where they were and what the facility was and I told her I used the end of the email address to bring it up on the net so I had the complete address. She said, well aren't you smart? Then she sounded really embarrassed and got off the phone. I tried to pad the embarrassment a little.

But one thing that it did say, was that I had a good resume'...it must be my personality or my interview that wasn't so great.

One of the things the doctor pointed out was I have never held a full time job and I am aware that I haven't and then he asked why I quit college and I told him that I had been in a car accident and had many years of therapy before I could go back on the work force. He didn't want anything from me. Not my letters of recommendation. NOTHING~ So I said thank you and left and put my letter of thanks in the mail today to thank them for the interview....

It is so devestating to find something you want and you know your qualified for but something you said or did wasn't quite right.

Well, I must move on today and put it behind me now, even though the effects are still hanging on today. Swollen eyes and tiredness~!

I looked in all the ad's today and nothing even close.

Thanks,
Melanie

[Emerging]

(((Mel))), you done GOOD for sure!!!

++ Your rez was so well done they called you not once but TWICE for an interview!
sidenote - how organized are they do have done that? Not very .... and would they take out their unprofessionalism on you time after time? Possibly ... sounds like they couldn't even laugh about their own mistake of calling you twice.... :rolleyes:

++ If something else didn't match, you are BETTER OFF not working with them ... thanks in LARGE part to my current job, I have needed counseling the ENTIRE time I've been at this place! :eek:

++Was it really >100 miles roundtrip? You do NOT need that, esp if we have a "real" winter this year!

Remember - I too was "courted" by one prospective job only to learn that they do so NOT have their act together very well at all. I would have gone from the pan to the fire for sure ... and I know that would have NOT been nice to do to myself at all. Do you check monster.com and other online job places as well as the papers? Hang in there dear one! Prayers continue ... :)

[Oopsie Daisey]

Hello Emerging,
No was not the office mistake. I sent them an email and realized that it was not the right thing to do and then turned around and sent the resume' and cover letter in the mail and they read it twice. They just have so many people that are prospective for the job that they have called me twice for an interview. It was both of our faults. Mine for two submits and I am sure they didn't expect that. It is quite a large practice and so I am not faulting them at all. In fact, I kind of felt bad for her. She was so sweet.

I just thought it was funny that both times they found my resume' attractive. LOL

Thanks Emerging for your loyalty. If I had stayed at my last job, I would have been in counseling, I assure you. I was caught between two bosses. One that I had for three and 1/2 years with another Doctor and the newest one. They both worked for the same hospital and boy was it political and I was in the hot seat and followed protocol and it ended up hurting my friend and my former boss. Fortunately we are still speaking because we both left there. She was fired and when my 90 days was up, they gave me a poor review and said some things I didn't agree with and wanted to extend my probation and I said,,,, NOPE...I gave you my best to begin with and you said it is not enough and so I asked for a change of status and went per diem that way I can still bid on jobs....

OH I am ramblin...but it does affect me..All of this was going on when the church was jerking me around right after I left...People were saying really rotten things and so I was unraveling all over the place... I didn't have a church to attend and this hospital was one that built it around spiritual values...too bad the employees didn't have any...We were bad.

Well, that's it for me.

Melanie

[Emerging]

sigh! (((Mel))), I hear you on the $$ but still feel that none of us don't want to take "just anything" ... because acting on desperation usually doesn't work out.

Take my job (PLEASE!!!) .... Just got done with my review and thank GOD I had just read somewhere to go in there with low expectations, so it doesn't catch you off guard. I had figured that I knew where the problems were and how to respond to them ... yes, some of them.

Didn't realize how everyone is going behind my back and ratting me out to the boss!! And so ... yeah, you already know the drill ... they are NOT saying anything to me first because ... they are NOT speaking the whole truth and they know it. Guess there's quite the concerted effort here to get me out ... I am now TOTALLY all for that!!!

So if I could make it on not working vs the job I have, I'd be out of here in a heartbeat. Since you are sitll in the midst of your recovery, my vote is that you take your time and look for something that supports and nurtures you. That's what I'm doing now, focusing in the "what's in it for me?" aspect because I've not done that strongly at all in the past.

Better head off before they catch me venting here ... sigh!

Why can't people just be nice and get along well? :(

[Oopsie Daisey]

sigh! (((Mel))), I hear you on the $$ but still feel that none of us don't want to take "just anything" ... because acting on desperation usually doesn't work out.

Take my job (PLEASE!!!) .... Just got done with my review and thank GOD I had just read somewhere to go in there with low expectations, so it doesn't catch you off guard. I had figured that I knew where the problems were and how to respond to them ... yes, some of them.

Didn't realize how everyone is going behind my back and ratting me out to the boss!! And so ... yeah, you already know the drill ... they are NOT saying anything to me first because ... they are NOT speaking the whole truth and they know it. Guess there's quite the concerted effort here to get me out ... I am now TOTALLY all for that!!!

So if I could make it on not working vs the job I have, I'd be out of here in a heartbeat. Since you are sitll in the midst of your recovery, my vote is that you take your time and look for something that supports and nurtures you. That's what I'm doing now, focusing in the "what's in it for me?" aspect because I've not done that strongly at all in the past.

Better head off before they catch me venting here ... sigh!

Why can't people just be nice and get along well? :(


Hi Emerging:

Just got through reading your post about your review and I am sorry that people are so mean. That is what happened to me on my last job. I had never had any idea that they felt like that about me. Some of the things they said were horrible...like I had B.O. and I was devestated because that is one area that my mom was most adamant about when we grew up and I know that my clothes were clean and I was clean and all the right stuff was used and so if there was B.O. it wasn't mine or if it was, it was because I was desperately ill and nothing I could have done anything about and if that is the case then I probably would have the same problem in many other jobs as well. Funny that they are the only ones that ever had that problem with me. They could wreak of cigarette smoke and smell like the bar but whatever they thought they were smelling it had to be B.O. and mine...Also I wasn't a team player, there again. Every other job I had thought I was..but they didn't think I was....It was sick and scarey and I was so wounded.

Emerging, I know that you have gone through so some rough places that I crumble and hide from and stay hidden because it brings me so much fear and raw feelings that I cannot even describe. It is very hard....

I need a job immediately though and that is my problem.

Melanie

[Emerging]

They could wreak of cigarette smoke and smell like the bar but whatever they thought they were smelling it had to be B.O. and mine...Also I wasn't a team player, there again. Every other job I had thought I was..but they didn't think I was....It was sick and scarey and I was so wounded. Emerging, I know that you have gone through so some rough places that I crumble and hide from and stay hidden because it brings me so much fear and raw feelings that I cannot even describe. It is very hard....

You are SO right about this all!!! Talked to someone who I can or cannot trust there, and told her that boss said she, too, ratted me out. She looked so hurt/scared, not defiant, so I think she's innocent. She and I both need to keep working until something better comes along ... what he said was blatantly false, and we both needed to know he lies when it's convenient for him. And painting me as poorly as he did ... finally I realized it was to justify he piddly raise (despite all the good I've done there this year). I know this is nothing compared to what so many others are going through, but it's just yet another witness of how so many are openly choosing evil over good ... PRAYERS for everyone here and esp you, (((Mel))), as you continue to heal (yay!!!) and look for a good job. :p